I think the formula for drastic transformation goes a little something like this…
rock bottom (life altering event, breakdown, dead end) + desperation + full body readiness x surrender = the beginning of transformation
Shortly after my rock bottom moment of laying on the floor realizing I had to make a real change in my life (check out last week’s newsletter if you haven’t yet for the full story here), I stumbled over to good ole YouTube and circled back to a video I remember watching of the Find Guru, where she was sharing a similar story about how she decided to stop watching TV and listening to music for 21 days because she wanted to change her reality.
Truthfully (we’re in a safe space, right?) I had tried this before but I didn’t have enough clarity about who I wanted to become or what I wanted to do, so while I did see some progress in personal growth, it didn’t give the full transformation I was hoping for. One thing about me tho, if at first I don’t succeed, ima dust myself off and try again, every time. *sings Aaliyah* 🎶
hi <3 quick check in - you can find me chat thru this more on my channel here
As all this energy was flowing I decided it was time to go for my own challenge again and really take root in it.
Something I struggled with for a long time, especially on YouTube, was spending more time consuming other people’s content than creating my own and then feeling discouraged about the fact that my channel wasn’t taking off the way I had hoped for — even tho I was only putting in half the work as the people I was watching. The math wasn’t mathing sis. 0/10 stars, don’t recommend <<<<<<<
Yes life be lifing, and we will deal with that in another episode, but if you want to get anywhere in life, you have got to become a student of yourself. Be accountable about (not discouraged by) the areas you fall short, the places you cut corners and also take note of what you do really well and what comes natural to you. You have got to be able to keep it 103 with yourself if you ever want to see real growth and success.
In my experience, you can’t hold yourself to any standard if you don’t even know who you are or can’t be honest with yourself about when you need to be checked. Investing time into your relationship with yourself is soooo important and I could really spend a whole article here, but anyway chile let me get back on track
Visualize your dream self and show up as her/him.
So with this information in mind, I thought about my goals, who I want to be mentally, physically, spiritually, financially and emotionally, and most importantly how I want my life to feel. I envisioned her (my best self) in my mind from what she wears, what she eats, where she frequents, how often she works out, how she does her hair, who she hangs around, her daily habits and hobbies, her aura, how she devotes spiritually and how she serves.
I created my dream self in my mind and zoned so deep in on her until I could see myself as her, walking and talking and living every day life. Then I worked backwards to set action items of what I can do now to embody her and I created boundaries for myself of what needed to be eliminated or minimized from my life based on how it aligns with who she is.
important note: visualizing your dream self is something that takes time, especially for you to a) get clear and b) really believe. I’ve been dreaming about this version of myself for a long time, taking steps towards her (and backsliding) so this wasn’t my first time doing this exercise. this moment was just the pinnacle when it became so clear and my actions in the physical world were finally a match for my dreams.
Visualize your best self daily, think about him/her often and ask yourself if future you would do what you’re doing. ex: if you want to live a plant based lifestyle, when you think about going to shake shack for a burger, ask yourself if this is what the idealized version of yourself would do… do people that are plant based eat at shake shack? probably not — It’s not to say that you still won’t do it but it helps to get that internal compass ticking so you can align your actions with who you say you want to be. That way, your good good conscience can kick in and make you aware that you know better, but are in fact, not doing better. issa choice
(I learned a lot of this from Vibrate Higher Daily school with the incredible Lalah Delia, I highly recommend reading her book if you haven’t yet)
Now for the practical part:
I’m a strategy coach by trade (slide in my DM’s if you want to book a session with me 🤓) so I put on my thinking cap and got to work. every successful project/campaign is broken down into this basic framework:
ideation: brainstorm or as I like to call it, a brain dump session. how can you come up with a route (strategy) if you don’t even have a destination in mind yet?
strategy: this is your game plan of what you want to achieve, your road map
implementation: how will you put it in motion? what will you do or not do to achieve said outcome?
measurement: once you get the plan in motion, how do you track your progress? how will you know if it worked? or if it didn’t?
key takeaways: this is the big one that we often miss… reflection. what did you learn? if the project (in this case challenge) was a success, how can you replicate it? if it wasn’t, why do you think it went out sad and what changes will you make for the next go round?
so for me, my idea was to change my reality, my strategy was to create more than I consume, I implemented it by eliminating anything that would distract me, creating everyday + incorporating fresh things that would help me get closer to that goal, I measured my progress by keeping note of the amount of content I was creating + goals I was crossing of my list, and I kept track of my key takeaways by journaling each day about how my day went, how I worked toward my goal, what I created and how I am feeling about it overall
CHALLENGE INS & OUTS
INS:
reading daily, 1 chapter per day (currently reading Atomic Habits by James Clear)
spending more intentional time outdoors
recording content when I get the idea rather than waiting for the perfect moment
actually posting the content & not hoarding it in my phone (heavy on this one)
listening to audio books on business / branding / relevant topics to my professional journey
listening to podcast interviews of successful entrepreneurs I align with/admire
devoting intentional time with God daily + reading scripture
driving in silence or to meditation music
building consistency in my workout routine
journaling daily again
OUTS:
watching vlogs / casual podcasts / anything non-educational or motivational
checking my phone when I first wake up
listening to music in the car / commuting / at work
self doubt: lack of belief in myself
procrastinating and pushing things off until the “perfect” moment
self sabotage
low vibrational foods
inconsistency
Now it’s your turn
I started seeing results immediately, some of which I mentioned in my last newsletter, and I believe it happened for a few simple reasons I shared above. I’m still only scratching the surface! Now it’s your turn to challenge yourself to be all that you can be and go all in on your dreams,
I believe in you friend, now it’s time for YOU to believe in you… and after all, if not now, then when?
With love, Ky 💌
to recap, take inventory of who you want to be and what’s holding you back from becoming that person
immerse yourself in the knowledge and habits of this lifestyle you desire to live, and seek out people online & IRL that are already living this life to draw inspiration from — be intentional with what you consume!
join me on this 21 day challenge and drop me a line so I can cheer you on through the process. you got this!